I was on the way to the hospital to get the results of my latest test. The ride seemed to take forever. What news would I receive? I looked up and realized how blue the sky was, the sun was shining and whatever the news, I was going to enjoy this moment!
As I approached the hospital I had spent so much time in the previous 6 months (major surgery and 6 months of chemotherapy) I thought of how naïve I was at the beginning of this journey; this was not going to impact me. I would get through this like all the other experiences in my life. But this was not like anything before. I was weaker and more dependent and in need of more help than ever before. I had always been the strong one! This time God had other plans for me.
Waiting in the room for the doctor, what could I expect going forward? The doctor arrived and began to explain to me what my chances were and how the diagnosis could affect my life. Stage four ovarian cancer was not the best news, but unfortunately it was the news I received. What did the diagnosis mean? I must have been in shock because I did not react as one would expect. My only question was, “ what are my chances of being here in 5 years?” His answer was, “God knows, but the percentages are not good in your favor.”
As I digested the news that I had feared, I considered my options. I could be SAD or live with HOPE.
S=shame, suicidal, sorrowful, somber
A=anguished, aggrieved, apprehensive
D=depressed, damaged, doubt, discouraged,
dispirited, disheartened
OR
H=happy, honest
O=overjoyed, open, optimistic, outstanding
P=pride, purpose, positive
E=enjoy, energetic, elated, excited
SAD – HOPE
Nobody knows how long they have. Enjoy each moment. I choose hope and continue to live with it each day!
